So, I am venting a bit on my blog. . .I actually have several updates to do, so watch out! Several are from my 90 day journey. . . some are about things going on in life. . .
For the first time that I can ever remember, I had my feelings hurt deeply today at church. . .I first wish to say that I had thoroughly enjoyed a great worship service and thank the amazing praise team, ministers, and the behind the scenes folks for the time and effort they put into each Sunday service. . I was honestly on a HIGH!
My frustration is with trying to help out with something and having another person jump in- in front of me- without acknowledging my trying to help. I was being directed by another person do something. . .and was fine with following orders. . . I only asked to wash my hands first (because it involved food preparation). I have tried in other ways to volunteer with this ministry and it never seemed to work out. I stood in the kitchen almost shocked. . . and then someone else came in and asked about helping. . . I told them, "well, I just tried to help and they didn't seem to need it, so I don't think they need help." The person who was giving directions overheard me and then asked if I would move drinks to another area- at which point I did.
But, my heart was honestly not in staying. . .I left the Apple bake I had fixed for dessert and headed home. . . I was crying. This situation really hurt my heart. . . For, it makes one feel as if you are not good enough, not worthy of helping. . . And, maybe I did not handle it well. . .I said very loudly, "well excuse me," primarily because I was so shocked. This person has been this way towards me in the past. . .so I am not sure why I am shocked.
So, I am going to spend the afternoon napping, reading, and working on some paperwork. ..I foresee a run in my future for this afternoon as the weather is beautiful!
So, I am going to ask my bloggy friends for prayer. . . My heart is aching. . .
God Bless!
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4 comments:
Church work and people can make ministry very difficult sometimes. Hang in there . . .
Hi just stopping by your blog. I had someone tell me recently in a meeting at church that I was asking too many questions. I know what you mean about hurting your heart. Hang in there.
I certainly understand hurt feelings and it is especially difficult when it's among our family.
Did you talk to this person? I've been on both sides--hurt someone's feelings or mine have been hurt. I can think of a recent example where someone took me aside and told me I had hurt them. I did not know and would not have known unless they told me. I was so thankful. And I've talked to people when they've hurt me.
I believe God calls us to be "face to face" with each other to work it out.
I love you.
Jill
Oh, I am so sorry that you were hurt. For some reason, coming from a Christian brother or sister it seems to sting a bit more, doesn't it? I notice I am a lot more sensitive when it comes to them, anyway.
I am going to back up what Jill said though, I really believe you should go and talk to this person. Perhaps they don't know they are offending you and it would really make a difference if they were aware. Maybe just go up to them and say something like, "Is there a way that I have offended you in the past that we may have gotten off on the wrong foot? You know, this thing happened last weekend and my feelings were very hurt. I've noticed in the past similar occurrences like this. I want to correct any problems that I can, is there something we can do to fix it?"
I really hope things work out for you! Blessings!
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